The Bill Cosby of the Bible
“The Bible is not for the squeamish.” — Johanna Steibert
If the Bible were a movie, it would be rated R — maybe XXX. The holy book of the Christian faith overflows with tawdry tales of sex, violence, and murder. Some of the well-known stories exist in the cultural ethos as pastors, Sunday school teachers, and even spiritual-themed cartoons cover them frequently.
Stories like David and Goliath, Adam and Eve, and Moses and the 10 Commandments. Even the bloody execution of Jesus is common fare preached from the pulpit.
Then there are the lesser-known stories churches seem to avoid — almost hide away from the masses.
Like the shocking story of the “Bill Cosby” of the Bible.
Disclaimer: This story is meant to discuss a historical record in the Bible, not disparage revered scripture or insult Christians. Nor is this piece meant to attack or support Bill Cosby.
Is This the Bible or Pornhub?
Here’s how the taboo story starts. According to the Biblical record, a guy named Lot escaped to the mountains near the Dead Sea with his two daughters.
The Bible lays it out in Genesis 19:30 (NSV):
“And Lot went up out of Zoar, and dwelt in the mountain, and his two daughters with him; for he feared to dwell in Zoar: and he dwelt in a cave, he and his two daughters.”
For context, Lot is Abraham’s nephew. Abraham is the one who nearly American Psycho-ed his firstborn son at the top of a mountain. You might have heard the story.
Back to Lot. No one really knows for sure why he fled Zoar. Some think it’s because of the nuclear wasteland of Soddom and Gomorrah, or that he didn’t believe the angelic promise of safety.
For whatever reason, he felt exposed and vulnerable in Zoar. So, like any good father, he packed up his two daughters and moved into a Dead Sea cave.
What happens next sounds like a scene right off of Pornhub, a popular porn website.